Fic Rec: I Prefer to Text (series), by songlin

[ancientreader]

Title: I Prefer to Text (series): (1) House Rules; (2) On Holiday; (3) A Curious Incident; (4) Where the Lovelight Gleams
Author: songlin
Pairing: John/Sherlock
Length: 5,444 total
Rating: PG/T, verging on G
Warnings: Nah, unless you're seriously arachnophobic, and then only for House Rules
Verse: BBC Sherlock
Author's summary: There is none for the series as a whole.
House Rules: In which it is explained, via text messages and notes, exactly why John Watson has to put his foot down when it comes to the refrigerator and what is kept in it. Also: camel spiders, and why they are the physical manifestations of fear.
On Holiday: In which the happy couple takes a vacation to sunny Spain. Thank God for those funny little cards that make mobiles work abroad.
A Curious Incident: In which Sherlock has to see a man about a dog.
Where the Lovelight Gleams: They say you get to missing the people you've lost around the holidays.

Reccer's comments: The first three parts of this series provide some of the most sheerly hilarious Sherlock-and-John interactions I've ever read. Oh, the shoutiness and the carping and the complaining and the threats and the mutual adoration! The fourth is set post-Reichenbach. I've tagged for humor on account of the first three parts; the last changes mood starkly (but bear in mind your reccer requires happy endings).

Excerpt (brief, but surely sufficient to lure you):
"I know roughly 42 ways to kill you with my bare hands, I am armed, I literally know where you sleep and I spend a lot of time with my teeth in close proximity to your cock. Do not test me, Sherlock Holmes. John"

Read on the AO3.

Comments

[write-out.livejournal.com]

I've had House Rules bookmarked for ages, but it's been a long time since I've come back to it. The bit you quoted above is in my top 10 favorite lines in fanfic. I just cried laughing reading this one again and now I'm off to read the rest again as well.

[ancientreader]

Hooray! I'm delighted to have reminded you of this enchanting series.

[bk7brokemybrain.livejournal.com]

Thank you for the rec! I'd never seen that series before and it was delightful. "The bathroom smells like dog placenta." LOL That's a sentence that (obviously) has stuck with me. Heee.

[ancientreader]

Yay! I'm so glad you enjoyed it!

[bugeyedmonster.livejournal.com]

Hahahaha..... this rec had me at 'camel spiders'.

Poor little camel spiders, just wanting somewhere nice and dark, like the inside of a soldier's helmet......

[ancientreader]

... or his shoe ...

;^)